Ian Thorpe retired from swimming a few days back at the age of 24, with so much more gas left in the tank.At the press conference held after the announcement he said,"you can swim lap after lap, staring at a black line, and all of a sudden you look up and see what's around." To the world it might have been a blade of stupidity from someone who once ruled the world of swimming, and will always be considered an athelete who was second to none, but to me it wasn't so.

The last month and a half have really been a roller coaster ride.It all started around Antaragni or so, the cult fest of IITK , when i began to feel that the fever i was suffering from was more than just a dose off.But i had many commitments to keep up, so despite being 101 degrees down the whole time, i still went ahead to compere at Rithambhara(the fashion parade), the professional nite and took part in the english debate.It was all fun n frolic, we won the debate pants down, Rithambhara was great and a lot of people appreciated my efforts, came on Mtv etc etc.All seemed perfect.Then the downhill started.A week after, i was diagnosed with typhoid, stage 2.To some extent my negligence of just considering the fever a minor viral infection and surviving by paracetamols, and to some the sheer lack of medical ethics of the doctors at the health centre here meant that the disease had been allowed to reach the second stage.I had to finally take things in my own hands and move to my grandmother's place, who being a doctor herself now began looking after me.The worst fear was that i wouldnt get the time to prepare for my endsemester exams, and as is with the system here, its as reckless and unforgiving as it can be, one slip and your out.At one point i felt that all my efforts of the semester were in vain, but somehow i kept telling myself that all would be fine.The next big hurdle was convincing the stupid faculty here that i actually was unwell, which was pathetic to the core, and the process took ages.My dad had to come down and speak to the authorities here and they finally agreed to allow me makeups of a couple of the endsems.All this while i was moved between home and hostel, giving stupid quizzes, trying to study despite the fact that my body didnt allow me so, all the while because i knew that the stupid maggus of the godforsaken place are mugging away to glory, and if i want to match up, i have to do the same, no matter what my condition.But i really never quite managed much in those days.Not seeing life under my control and things just not falling into palce was perhaps what made me the most uncomfortable.I swore that for the larger good of people here(being a senator and the health centre student's rep) i would raise all these issues in upcoming meetings, but as things would have it, the meetings fell before my makeups .Anyways, all finally ended great and i cracked every single exam like never before.To me, it was a big relief and a very satisfying end to a time i really will remember for a long while.Perhaps the best that has come out of this is that ive learnt that its a real dog eat the dog world, and nobody cares, if you want things to happen your way, you have to push for them.But then sometimes i wonder whether all this is really worth it.Whether id really look back at these times 30-40 years down the line and smile.Whether a system which makes you more tougher and less a human is good.And then perhaps i say to myself to just let go and keep doing what im suppose to do.I mean that is the only way i know ive achieved whatever little success i have,and failed whenever i havent, so no point in trying new stunts.Atleast not yet.

These vacations are really nice so far though.A little bit of work, a little bit of rest, movies, food, sleep.Project is moving slowly, still trying to code up the thinning algorithm, but im sure we'll be done with the work in 7 days.Somehow i hate coding, so will never find this my forte.I would find image processing a lot more stimulating, maybe bacuase i can apply all the filter theory ive read the last sem, and learn a lot more, but Prof Venky believes we must first get this doen to gain "experience".Whatever the doc orders i guess.Been in touch with some old friends recently, and as always it feels great.